Looking Back
by Kyrieath
Summary: One shot 'origin' style fic for a human Paladin RP character on Wyrmrest Accord.


Author Note: Yet more character 'origin' style ficcage for an RP character; this time my human Paladin Talys on Wyrmrest Accord. The other characters mentioned (Candesca, Gethion) are played by my partner, though one is on a different server.

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You could say the following things about training to be a Paladin: It was rigorous, demanding, time consuming....

And boring and uncomfortable as hell when it came time for meditation.

"Clear your thoughts, Talys; let your mind embrace the Light." I can't even recall this instructor's name; he must not be one I deal with very often or he'd know full well that's never going to happen. Even so, I settle myself in apparent compliance. I just have to sit here for half an hour and look...I don't know, peaceful or something. I hate this part of the training.

If there's one thing I don't want in my life, it's time to think. Maybe the whole idea of this exercise was to not think, but that was easier said than done. As the instructor moves on to soothe the next in line, I close my eyes and just wait for the inevitable to happen. My mind always turns to certain roads during this time; sometimes I wish I had become a mage like Candesca. My cousin probably didn't have time to stroll down memory lane like this with all the spells they were cramming into her brain.

Still, at least the beginning of this little mental walk isn't so bad. It's the only place I can see my real family anymore; Candy was about the only one from the De'Laraines I'd call that. Uncle Brendor and Aunt Jeylana hadn't been necessarily cruel, but they'd not exactly been eager to take in the daughter their 'prodigal' sister had left behind when she went marrying beneath her status, then had the gall to die and leave behind after her husband had died.

I would have hated living with them if not for my cousin, Candesca; she was a mouse but she could at least be convinced to try out games like hide and go seek. It always got us in trouble but it was fun until we got caught or Candy showed up with a bit of dirt or a ripped hem on her oh so perfect and expensive dress. Their attempts to keep us out of trouble is what led to my 'real' family being found, though.

Uncle Brendor and Aunt Jeylana had been determined their perfect little girl would be a mage; and who better to instruct a future mage than elves? But oh no; they couldn't send their precious, delicate little girl off to Dalaran to learn. Who knows what bad habits they'd teach her since one didn't have to have status there, just talent? I still have to wonder at what sum of money or what else they offered up...but a few months later, the Dath'anar family had come to stay in the guest house.

It was all for Candesca's sake to learn mage craft safely in her own home, but it had a boon for me too. The mother, Aundora, had little enough to do with me; she was all about training Candy and informed my aunt and uncle pretty quick that I'd never be a mage. I didn't lack the talent, but I certainly lacked the disposition. So I was given to general tutoring with her husband, a priest. My aunt and uncle were fine with that; they probably thought he might make something decent out of me.

Proof they'd never met him for more than five minutes.

Gethion Dath'anar and his son Kelenas were the best things that could've ever happened to me. I finally had a playmate that liked the same games I did- once I got him to loosen up a bit, anyway- and Gethion was _nothing_ like what everyone said elves should be like. Oh he filled his role as tutor alright; but unlike those dried up old nannies that had looked after Candesca and I, he made it _fun._ And the minute it was plain all his students were bored and no longer paying attention, it was out into the yard to play. And it wasn't just 'watch the kids play'; he played right along with us. Trying to picture Uncle Brendor ever doing something like that was beyond even my imagination's ability to produce.

Those were the best years in my entire life. Gethion was more of a father or uncle than Uncle Brendor had ever been; I think he even took it a little seriously, at least, when I asked him if I could go with them back to Quel`Thalas. He said he'd discuss it with his wife, at least; Kelenas was certainly eager for it. He had already taken to calling me his 'other sister', the one he could play with since his little sister Thiria was still just a baby.

When they'd packed to head back home for awhile, I was hopeful; Gethion had said he'd have an answer for me when they came back to pick up Candesca's tutoring again after the break.

I never got my answer. They never came back.

A few months later, Lordaeron was in a panic. The undead plague was spreading and no one knew how. At first it was something we heard about in far off places; the Prince had gone off to investigate, or so we were told, so there would be nothing to fear. The people calmed a little and began to go back about their lives...that was all happening somewhere else.

It wasn't happening in Lordaeron's primary city; we were perfectly safe. The estate was set a good ways away from the city proper anyway; servants did all the shopping. The only time Candesca or I had ever left it was in the care of our tutors; going to the library or picking up supplies they wanted us to see varying kinds of for our own future shopping needs.

As I sit here in this oh so brilliantly lit temple, I can still see those dark hallways the day we learned it wasn't so. Candesca and I hadn't eaten breakfast that day; we might not have been adults, but we certainly weren't children to be all eager to smell something sweet coming out of the kitchen. She had opted to go study; I had opted to go along and do my best to try to entice her into goofing off instead. If Aunt Jeylana was going to keep harping on about how I was such a potential bad influence, I could at least attempt to play the part, right?

We missed the parade to welcome the Prince back; we didn't miss what followed.

Even in this quiet, holy place I can't quite keep a shiver down. Maybe it was surviving that day that made me believe in the Light after all, if not in the way a Paladin supposedly should. I couldn't even clearly recall what happened; flashes of sound, of sight...screaming servants, unearthly howls and shrieks coming shortly afterward...I remember grabbing Candy's wrist and hauling her to the nearest window as those screams started.

I didn't care about Uncle Brendor or Aunt Jeylana; not enough to go charging through a house that suddenly felt like a death trap as the reason for those screams began to dawn in the back of mind. We had heard whispered stories among the servants, gathered from survivors of places struck by the plague. Now we were in one of those stories; listening to people screaming as they became something else, something horrible....

We'd fled the house through the window of the study; I had to all but throw Candy through it, then drag her off. She didn't want to leave her parents, I didn't want to leave her. The nightmare had only continued from there...I had wanted to head north, to go to Quel`Thalas and find Gethion. I was sure the Dath'anar family wouldn't turn us away...but what would come to be known as the 'Plaguelands' stood between us and Quel`Thalas. Those forces that were trying to contain the Scourge turned us away; they forced us to go south with the other refugees.

Candesca had looked back the entire time we had run from the nightmare Lordaeron had become. I was the one looking back when we turned south, away from where the Dath'anar family had to be.

I didn't cry the entire time, however; not until we had gotten to something like safety at last...only to learn Quel`Thalas had fallen to the Scourge in the time it had taken us to crawl our way through the Eastern Kingdoms. Most, if not all of those there, had been slain or so the story went.

I believe in the Light now...because something had to have been watching our backs to keep us alive while it seemed like everyone else we cared about was dying. I don't believe we were singled out for any grand purpose, mind...just that something took pity on two girls, one of whom was suddenly orphaned in that mess no less. How much of a mercy that honestly was though...I'm not sure.

I shake my head suddenly and rise up from my seat; the instructor watches me leave the room without a word, then ghosts quietly after me to leave the other students to their meditation.

"...You look ill at ease, Talys."

"Do they pay you to be this observant?" I shouldn't be snappish at him; but so help me, I couldn't stand meditation. He watches me a moment, nameless to my mind with unremarkable features as he considers me. Brown hair, brown eyes, weather beaten skin...he could have been damned near anyone in Stormwind.

"They 'pay me' to give guidance. Do you know the purpose of meditation, Talys?" He settles down on a bench befpre the statue in the square before the Cathedral, gesturing for me to sit beside him. I consider just walking off for a moment; the last thing I need to do is hear some pious speech again. ...Odd thing for a paladin in training to think, perhaps, but there you are. Still, if I were turned out of the temple, I would find myself up the creek without a paddle; apprentice mages are housed within the tower, the same as paladin squires are housed within the Cathedral or nearby as space allowed. We didn't have any home within Stormwind to call our own; so I sit next to him, sighing.

"To sit and be bored until my arse is so numb I walk like I'm keeping a polearm sheathed up it?" That gets a faint quirking of one bushy eyebrow; but he's just shaking his head with a faint smile, maybe, under that thick mustache of his.

"To find why we look to the Light and learn what path we will take under its guidance. Some of us come here in search of healing and to gain the power to heal others in return...others come to defend that which they love and find the means to do so." He pauses a moment, waiting to see if I would say anything perhaps, before moving on. "...Then there are those who come here to learn not the ways of healing or guardianship, but to purify and bring justice. Through meditation, we learn which road will be ours."

He claps a hand to my shoulder suddenly, giving it a firm squeeze.

"I am sending you to another instructor; I think your path has already been chosen. It was before you ever set foot in these halls. You have been irascible, prankish and sharp- but your faith is genuine if not worn on your sleeve for all to see. Meditation will not smooth away traits the Light itself does not seem to deem unworthy- if mildly inconvenient for the rest of us. As such...your time here is done. Seek out Brother Sammuel in Northshire; he will begin you on the path of Retribution." He rises up from the bench and smiles down at an expression I almost wish I could see myself. It certainly felt like I had to be ready to catch flies with as loose as my jaw felt. "May the Light bless you, Sister Talys."

He leaves me then, returning to the Cathedral and the squires still meditating away in one of the rooms inside. A room I didn't have to see anymore. A hallway I wasn't restricted to walking daily on my way to that room.

'Sister Talys' not 'Squire Talys'. Could he really just declare it like that and send me on? Well...it wasn't as if ceremonies were held unless a noble or royal were taking up the Paladin's oath or a large number of Paladin Squires needed to ascend together. It occurs to me after he's long since vanished I didn't even bother to ask his name; there's a fleeting thought of chasing him down to get it- one I abandon quickly enough as I turn to run to the Squires' rooms instead to pack. It's still a casting out of a sort; a Paladin has no place in the Squires' quarters- but that was fine. I finally had my leave of the Cathedral; I would have to stop by and tell Candy so she'd know where to look for me once she was ready but for now? It was time to just enjoy being able to walk around Stormwind and hear the bells tolling the hour and not care that I wasn't at this or that class.

The path of Retribution, was it? ...I like the sound of that. Light knows I have at least one person to pin all the blame on for everything I'd lost, that Candy had lost and I will never let myself forget it.

As I stroll toward the Mage Tower, however, I can't help but allow myself a brief moment of ironic amusement. Who would have ever thought that by always looking back, I would find my way forward?

~Fin~


End file.
